The Trixie Update

At first I thought it was the lack of sleep, but it happens even when I’m rested. I’ll be running water at the sink or listening to the radio and I hear Trixie crying. I go in to get her and discover she’s sound asleep.

I return to what I was doing, turn the water back on or the radio up — and I hear her again. When I go back to check on her, she’s still sound asleep. I realized pretty quickly that she was not making noise in her sleep. It’s all in my head. It’s the phantom crying. I think this has to be some kind of instinctual reaction. You listen to her cries, squeals, grunts and screams so much that your mind tries to fill in the gaps when she is actually asleep and not making any noise.

I’m sure this is also related to every parent’s worry that a child may fall victim to SIDS. I find myself often peeking in her room to confirm that her chest is rising and falling. Sometimes it takes forever to get a lock on her movement, especially if she’s under a few blankets. As great as it is when she’s asleep, the phantom noises are a subconscious acknowledgement that it’s more comforting when she’s awake. Scary.

[Read more →]

“Hey, why is it getting dark in here?
There better be a movie or an eye examination starting soon, cause I KNOW I’m not going to sleep right now.
Are you crazy? WHY are you getting in bed? Don’t tell me you’re going to try to sleep. Hey - does that guy know what you’re doing in here?
What? He’s in on it?!

Fine, lady, we’ll do it your way. Just let me take a deep breath so I can cry louder.”

[Read more →]

It’s hard to predict how any given breast-feeding session might unfold. Weeks and weeks ago, before Trixie learned to comfort-nurse, it was hard to get her to feed for more than five minutes at a time. Once she decided she had had enough, she would just sloooowly lean back and freeze. Her eyes would still be open, bright and warily observing Jennifer, but her body would be totally stiff. Now this defense mechanism is successfully employed against predators by many animals, such as possum and lizards, “But really, Trixie, we can see your eyes are open. We’re staring right at you.”

We don’t see much of that anymore. Now-a-days, when she’s full, we get a lot of her sluggishly rolling around, “No, really, I can’t possibly eat another bite.” But just as often she’s content to latch on for hours and hours with a “No, that’s OK. I’m fine right here, thanks for asking.” And occasionally she just goes to sleep after a good feeding.

Sometimes, however, she pretends she’s starving and settles in to nurse for a few minutes. She then becomes frenetic, thrashing around like a shark tearing into a seal. Growling, spit-bubbling, limbs flailing, chomping and shaking her head from side to side, she violently attacks Jennifer — only to wear an innocent, perplexed expression when abruptly pulled away.

Sitting her down face to face, Jennifer demands, “Trixie, WHAT is going on!?”

Trixie just sits there, staring back wide-eyed. Then she leans forward, squints her eyes and grunts, “HEY! Trying to nurse here!”

Then Trixie will pretend to be hungry again and that THIS TIME it’s for real and that she promises to calm down and nurse right, but of course 60 seconds later there’s a fresh Trixie attack. This behavior has lead to more feedings by bottle where’s there less chance of Jennifer getting mauled.

[Read more →]

Trixie has a crazy look in her eye. She doesn’t like being swaddled and she doesn’t think she needs to be restrained. We can tell from her hissing and grunting. She looks at us with the narrowed eyes of the little lunatic she is, “Nothing can stop me and my army of spiders.”

[Read more →]

Apparently Trixie hates pants and wants to run around naked. She had tried to bargain with us, promising that if we take her diaper off, she won’t pee all over everything. We don’t trust her for a second.

[Read more →]

I have decided that based on her phenotype, Trixie must have a predilection toward eating bugs. Oh I know, all children try to eat bugs once they are crawling around in the yard, but Trixie has already been eyeing the bugs at the window and her long sticky tongue is always darting about.

She loves to listen to little songs we have made up about how many bugs she can eat, and whether she catches them with her tongue or her feet.

[Read more →]

I am now worried that she’s going to be very difficult to care for once she starts blending into her surroundings. Being my first child, I have no idea at what age this might kick in, but I am taking care to wrap her in solid color blankets without too many patterns on them.

On another note: Trixie’s skin on her hands has begun to crack and peel. She is clearly molting and preparing to shed her skin.

[Read more →]